myloveforoffalmeats

Virge and I went to Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles with a couple friends yesterday, after watching Ponyo (hooray for Ponyo!) at the Paseo. I made up my mind fairly quickly, though I hesitated because I thought I might gross out my wife and friends. I wanted fried chicken livers. I still want them. There are some waiting for me in the fridge at home and I want them. Here's why: because they taste so darn good.

Sometime around 1993 or 4 I was at John Guthrie's house. John liked to deep fry things and he showed me a plate of little amorphous fried blobs. The one thing John loved more than deep frying things was telling kids like me to pick up hot things with their tender little fingers. John had no nerve endings in his hands so he would grab pans straight out of the oven and laugh when his family complained about the burning flesh smell. Just kidding. He's only slightly less hardcore than that. I hope he doesn't read this. Anyway, I ate a fried chicken gizzard and have loved offal meats ever since: cow brains, chicken livers, fish eyeballs (I know those don't count--quiet you!) and anything that would make somebody else cringe--so long as it's delicious.

thereisroomforflyingcarsandmonorailsinmyreligion

I think I need a trinity, y'know? A parallel trinity.

God the father = flying cars
Jesus Christ = pneumatic tubes
the Holy Spirit = monorails

Yes, I think I can announce this at the next council, at which point the different permutations can all be weighed, and heretics given swirlies. Yep, I wrote this.

Foot-in-Mouth Disease

(from 8/4/09)

Hello ghostreaders,

Kill me.