This was read at Joshua's memorial last Thursday. I should have realized that the term "catechumen" would be lost on almost everyone, as it is apparently unknown even to my computer's spell check program. According to Wikipedia: "a catechumen is one receiving instructions from a catechist in the principles of the Christian religion with a view to baptism. The title and practice is most often used by Orthodox Christians and Roman Catholics."
"Joshua and I shared a
propensity toward fear and doubt that stained everything in our lives. Joshua
inspired me by clinging to scripture as the only thing that really could be
trusted. Before I met him, he found his
Anchor in the Storm, and he clung to it until the end. When I met Joshua, I
said something about dying for some cause and he said, from memory, an
Authoritative List of Causes for Which a Christian must be willing to die: 1.
The inerrancy of scripture, 2. The deity of Jesus, and 3. (I don’t remember
number 3 and I thoughtlessly failed to write it down when Joshua repeated it to
me in February). And like that, a question was answered for him. It was like he
was some fourth century catechumen preparing for baptism. I couldn’t believe
it: someone was actually taking the Christian life seriously.
And so Joshua and I
became friends. I had lingering doubts about Christianity, hell, and my own
status in the eyes of God. Joshua, who shared many of these doubts, supplied
Scripture and Reason. I became, as Joshua realized shortly before his death,
spiritually dependent on him, buying his belief system wholesale since it
seemed to have provided for him precisely the kind of clarity of purpose that I
wanted for my life. So I was apprenticed to him in the ways of Conservative
Evangelicalism. He drove me one night to the Half Price Books in Everett just
to buy me an NASB, which I still have today.
A lot has happened
since then. To Joshua’s chagrin I rejected the concept of inerrancy, losing
some of the certainty I sought when I befriended him. He stuck with me despite
my heresy, calling me every week for almost the entire time prior to Amber. We
realized that our shared commitment to the truth kept us on the same page
despite our disagreements. Since Joshua grounded his opinions in plain reason
and his understanding of scripture, there were never raised voices, no
accusations of backsliding or backwardness. He was always deeply respectful and
fair. I couldn’t have asked for a better friend to see me through my first
eight years of marriage.
What else is there to
say? As I discovered in writing this remembrance: too much. What of his
effortless sense of humor, razor sharp but never cutting? He didn’t tell jokes (at least not very
often); he perceived the world truthfully and simply stated his observations.
Since the whole world is ridiculous he was never short of material. In short,
his humor was a natural consequence of his personality. He never had to work at
it; he just *was* funny.
What of his perfectionism
and the outrageous standard he always held himself to, his immediate
responsiveness to perceived needs, his turbo-geek preoccupations with ham
radios and flash drives, the impossibly Spartan apartments that no other human
being could live in, his hyper-rational scripture interpretation, Chess, the
stench in the Illuminate II when he kept his wet shoes in the backseat, that
*Helmet*??!?
It’s
too much. You loved us well, and we love you dearly, good friend. Goodbye,
Joshua."
