Post 61

Sixty-one is the 18th prime number--a twin prime with 59. My brother-in-law intends to teach his children to count to 1024 in binary on their fingers. I intend to waste my children's time by teaching them to count in prime factorizations: one, two, three, two squared, five, two times three, seven, two cubed, three squared, two times five (I love this!), eleven, two squared times three, thirteen, two times seven, three times five, two to the fourth, seventeen, two times three squared, nineteen, two squared times five (I just now decided to stop at thirty), three times seven, two times eleven, twenty three, two cubed times three, five squared, two times thirteen, three cubed, two squared times seven, twenty nine, two times three times five. Alright, that was fabulous. I just realized that thirty is the first number with three distinct prime factors. A good place to end. You see, this torture will give my children an intuition for the Fundamental Theorem of Arithmetic, and an appreciation of the primes, which obviously are less work than the composites. Anyway, we'll wait to see if this actually happens.

I wanted to tell a joke about how this all relates to my retirement planning, since my genius child is certain to solve some long-outstanding problem regarding primes, one with at least a million-dollar prize for its solution. I think funding my 403(b) may be a better idea.

Another blog pose

Inkeeping with my new tradition of retaining typos in blog post titles, the title of this post says "pose" instead of "post." I will leave it to you to interpret that Freudian slip of the fingers.

Blogger won't let me post here from the library. I can save things fine, but it won't do anything when I click "publish post." Computers are the devil anyway.

Looking down at my shitty wallet I'm reminded of all the people who have told me to replace it. I'll take it out to pay for something in my standard business casual work clothes and they say "man, you need a new wallet." I won't believe them until one of my cards actually falls out of the huge hole in the side of it. This duct-tape constructed wallet was given to me by my father-in-law for Christmas... um, 2006 I think. Younger folks think it's cool, and it serves its purpose. It's staying.

Perhaps someday I'll be able to post this boring-ass entry. Not today.

This clog still exists

I just wanted to make it clear that I sometimes intend to post to this blog, so it "is still a going concern" as John Cleese did not say of the parrot. I have made a halfhearted commitment to post every time I visit the Fuller Library, so maybe I'll stick to that.

I mistyped the word "blog" as "clog" in the title. I like that word "clog" so much that I kept the title as-is even though it doesn't make sense. Make no mistake, folks: I want wooden shoes. Comfy ones with something soft inside, but still very traditional-looking. I want to do lots of damage if I'm ever called upon to kick somebody with them. Oh, and they need to have wings so I can fly.

Christmas is bearing down on us like a shotgun full of cheer. Goddamn motherfucking son of a holiday. I hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Christmas. You have to go to stores and spend money on people and talk to people and travel and smile and stuff. Horrible. Anyway, here's my eggnog recipe:

Separate two eggs. Mix about 1/3 cup cream, 2 tbsp sugar, a drop of vanilla, and some fresh-ground nutmeg (that's what the funny teeth on the cheese grater are for) and your booze (I use rum, Bourbon is popular) with the yolks. Whisk until smooth. Beat the whites to the desired stiffness. You have a decision to make: the stiffer you make them the less viscous the drink will be (good) but the less they will want to mix with the yolk mixture (bad.) This, at least, is my experience. Now you have to mix it all together. I prefer to add some of the yolk mixture to the whites, whisk until combined, then add gradually larger amounts. Other recipes suggest that you fold the whites into the yolks, but I think my way is a better way for avoiding clumps. I haven't figured out how to make the mixture truly uniform: the top of the glass is usually airier. So I recommend serving it with a stirring spoon. The result should be something that tastes "light," in a sense. When you realize 35 minutes later how much protein, fat, sugar and liquor you've consumed, you can sleep Yuletide away.